Today’s mental health spotlight is the lovely Anne from ForeverTheWanderer, who is going to discuss her experience with anxiety and depression. Please show her some love.
AN INSIGHT INTO MY DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY
In February of 2017, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Finally, I was given a name for the way I felt. It was such a sense of relief but also a huge burden. For years I had suicidal thoughts, wanting to self-harm, being stuck in a dark place for days or weeks on end and have no idea why I felt that way, I had trouble concentrating, my grades in school were slipping each and every year. I became numb to the world.
EACH AND EVERY DAY IS A STRUGGLE
Not every day is the same. One day I can jump out of bed and be ready to face the day. Other days I can barely get out of bed, much less face the world. Living with a mental illness is really difficult. Some days are easy and others are really really hard. There is no telling when the bad days are going to arise. Some days I can be sad, not wanting to speak, other days I can be a ball of anger. It’s always a rollercoaster.
PEOPLE DON’T UNDERSTAND ME
Family and people that I try and discuss my mental health with really don’t understand me. They tell me ‘just be happy ‘, ‘you have so much good in your life, what do you have to be sad about?’, ‘you don’t need pills’, ‘what will people say if they know you’re on pills?’ and so much more. It makes me so angry. People just assume I’m just sad not that I have been diagnosed with a mental illness! I find that a lot of people who have no idea what it’s like to have a mental illness can’t comprehend what it’s like for those who actually do.
JUST BECAUSE I HAVE DEPRESSION DOES NOT MEAN I’M A FREAK
The stigma around mental health is atrocious. We are looked at as if we are some strange species rather than human just like everyone else is. Yes, I have depression and anxiety. It’s a mental illness, not a symptom of being an alien. People I have known a long time look at me differently now since my diagnosis and it makes me so angry! I am the same person I was two years ago before I was diagnosed and began taking medication to help with my depression and anxiety. They have never seen me struggle because I was so good at hiding how I truly felt on the inside but now that I am openly discussing mental health and trying to show people that it’s nothing to be afraid off I’m the worst person in the world.
HOW I COPE WITH MY DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY
In all honesty, some days I can cope, other days I can’t cope with it. It can become so crippling which makes getting out of bed and getting on with my daily tasks very difficult. But, my medication makes it that little bit easier to control although it can still be very difficult.
Distracting myself with blog work, cleaning, listening to music, reading or any other activity that can take my mind off things really help when I’m not feeling 100%. Some days I can’t distract myself so I end up talking about how I’m feeling with my boyfriend. It can be really good to talk to someone who understands and who you trust.
A huge part of my depression is thinking of the absolute worst case scenario and my boyfriend is the only person who can calm me down and make me see sense and see the other ways a situation can turn out.
Find someone who can do that for you. If you suffer from a mental illness please don’t suffer alone. There are many of us who are here and know exactly how you are feeling. We need to discuss our mental illness to break the stigma and make it a better subject to talk about. No one else can do that but us.
Make sure you take care of yourself.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, Anne! As well as keeping up with Anne on her blog, you can also find her on Twitter.